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EFD stands for Executive Functioning Disorder. Executive functioning is the brain’s management system. I have read that it is similar to a conductor of an orchestra. Every section of an orchestra may play beautifully, but the song won’t sound good unless the conductor puts it all together correctly.

Therefore, the executive functioning of your brain pulls all the jobs of your brain together at the right time. Components of your brain’s functioning will be discussed below.

As I understand it, there are two main causes of EFD: ADHD (all presentations) and/or a learning disability.

• People with ADHD most definitely show the symptoms of EFD because ADHD is the impairment of executive functioning, by definition. From what I have read, it is pretty much impossible to have ADHD without having EFD.
• People with learning disabilities may or may not have EFD. Some learning disabilities involve only certain executive functioning weakness, while others do not.

So to summarize, a person with ADHD will have EFD. A person with a learning disability may or may not have EFD. It is also possible for a person to have both ADHD and a learning disability at the same time. Again, executive functioning difficulties would be present in this case.

On this website, I only address ADHD-I and the EFD that goes with it. Since I lack the hyperactivity component and do not have a learning disability, I will not be speaking to those diagnoses.

This post defines important terms and abbreviations to make all the material throughout the website easier to digest.

• DSM
• APA
• ADD
• ADHD
• ADHD-I
• ADHD-HI
• ADHD-C
• EFD

DSM– the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders published by the APA. It is the official handbook commonly used by healthcare professionals.

APA– American Psychological Association. It is the largest organization of professional psychologists in the United States.

ADD– Attention Deficit Disorder. It is the layman’s term for the condition of being easily distractible without any hyperactivity. It used to be an official term in the DSM. It is no longer a diagnosis recognized by the APA.

ADHD– Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. This too is a term that many people toss around in everyday speech without really knowing what it means. Most people on the streets use it when referring to anyone who is displaying any hyperactive behaviors.

It was and still is an official term in the DSM, though. Again, many people don’t realize that a diagnosis of ADHD means much more than appearing to have extra energy. It encompasses a lot more than that: poor memory, distractibility, weak social skills, etc.

ADHD-I– Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Predominantly Inattentive. In plain English, this is the new label for ADD. Beginning with the DSM IV, attention deficit issues became a presentation of ADHD. ADHD was designated as the umbrella and three types of presentations were identified within. Predominantly inattentive (ADD) is one of the three. That continues to be the method of identification today in the DSM V. More information from NCBI/NIH is here.

ADHD-HI– Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, predominantly hyperactive-impulsive. This is the second presentation now recognized. To me, this appears to be the new way of saying what used to be called ADHD.

ADHD- C– Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, combined. This is the last of the three presentations, which it puts it all together. As you would surmise, it is the hat trick of inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity all combined.

To be clear, currently, the official presentations are:

• ADHD-I: predominantly inattentive (previously ADD)
• ADHD-HI: predominantly hyperactive-impulsive
• ADHD-C: combined

EFD- Executive Functioning Disorder. EFD is a term that describes the difficulties of the brain’s management system, but it is not an official diagnosis.

So why did I choose the name ADD Adventures when ADD is not even a thing anymore? Because most people on the streets still use the term. Besides, ADHD-I is a bit clunky to use, and the inclusion of the letter H is a little confusing for many people. So essentially, I know the difference, but I will use ADD colloquially and use ADHD-I when speaking scientifically.

I’m here to explain ADD to people- those with ADD as well as those who live with, love, and work with them. I am here to help people understand why some of us are chronically late, disorganized, forgetful, and more. This is the information that I wish I had years ago. Perhaps this website can help you today.

Why me? Because I am an expert- I have ADD. I live with it everyday. I will take you into my mind to show you how it works (and doesn’t work) to help you understand yourself. I will also explain my thinking to those who do not have ADD to make your relationship with the ADD afflicted more tolerable.

What This Website Is

• A place to help others who experience ADD/EFD like I do (more on EFD later)
• A space to explain our world to others, who are puzzled and frustrated by our behaviors

What This Website Is NOT

• An excuse-making website
• A space for shaming others
• A place that condones staying stuck in dysfunctional patterns

This site is a place for self exploration, understanding of other people’s dysfunction, and a space for us to seek answers to questions, as well as offer insight and advice. This website is also a hub for locating knowledge from experts and locating helpful tools.

This is NOT, repeat NOT a place for trolls and haters. Just as I do not offer any excuses for dysfunctional behaviors that negatively impact oneself and others, it is also no place to publicly judge or shame.

Let’s Begin our Adventures Together

Essentially, this is a terrific place to learn, share, and grow in all things ADD- all with a tiny bit of humor. So come with me on my ADD adventures!

Before we dive right in, let’s define a few of my own terms that will pop up repeatedly throughout this website. Please note that I made up all of these monikers; if I am copying other people’s work, it is out of sheer ignorance on my part. If brought to my attention, I will give credit where due and make corrections.

Put some of this in other blog posts. Not here. Too wordy.

Jerks– self-explanatory. Simply put, these people are assholes. I don’t think I have ever worked with a person like this, but my internet research has shown me that many of us do encounter these jerks in the workplace and in their natural habitats.

My jerks with an upper case J- are a particular subspecies of asshats. These Jerks refer to the people who purposely show up to meetings, events, etc. late to piss people off, appear to be grandiose, and exert some twisted power over others. They frequently are at least thirty minutes late, don’t feel badly about their behavior, don’t apologize, and obviously don’t respect other people’s time. Like I said- assholes.

Jerks no doubt have issues that are outside the scope of this blog. Nothing I write about pertains to this subset of the chronically late. I absolutely do not defend this behavior nor try to explain it. Their issues are best addressed by licensed therapists.

Tryhards– this is the kinder, gentler subset of the chronically late. This is me. There are many of us out there, roaming the streets. We don’t want to be rude, we don’t consciously disrespect you or your time, we experience a near-constant feeling of shame and guilt, and we repetitively try various methods to arrive on time, to no avail. We try hard- we really do- hence the name.

We are the people who show up to meetings right at the expected time (never early) or perhaps three to ten minutes late. We are the coworkers who frequently mumble an excuse as to why we are a couple of minutes late- “Traffic was bad.” “I got stuck behind a slow driver.”. We are embarrassed by our behavior, and we apologize to all those present repeatedly.

If you are wondering why we don’t/can’t just leave a few minutes earlier (especially if we are truly trying), you have a legitimate question. I’ll address this elsewhere in the blog. LINK

If you feel that trying hard isn’t good enough and that this behavior still is disrespectful, even if unintentionally, you are right. Again, I am not making excuses for us chronically late types. LINK

Neurotyps– regular people who are neurotypical, meaning that they are wired typically. They do not suffer from EFD and do not have issues with being chronically late. This is not my original name. I just shortened it.

This blog is devoted to the Tryhards and to the Neurotyps who want an explanation as to why we can’t get our shit together.

In my eyes, Neurotyps (Typs for short) can be divided into two subgroups.

The first group, I call Emps. These people don’t understand us Tryhards, and they do get frustrated with us, but they are not super judgey and do try to exercise a bit of empathy toward us. Not to say that they excuse or like what we do, but they do try to empathize and, most importantly, look for other good qualities in us. In speaking for all of us Tryhards, thank you sincerely for living with us in spite of our faults.

Judgers, on the other hand, are my other subset of Neurotyps. Our chronic lateness, forgetfulness, etc. puts these people off, and they are visibly more intolerant about it. They are the people who could never live with us. They are justified in feeling frustrated by our behavior, and they certainly have a right to choose someone else as a roommate or spouse. Probably a good idea.

This subset tends to take our lateness personally. They tend to think that we are showing disrespect for them if we are late, and they also feel that if we cared enough and made something a priority that we wouldn’t be late. We obviously don’t care enough to be on time. This is logical and understandable, but not necessarily true. LINK HERE

One note on how Judgers try to offer advice- I think that Judgers don’t grasp that their snarky remarks don’t help.  Perhaps I’m wrong, but I suspect that Judgers don’t realize that we Tryhards experience shame every time we pull in late to work, and they think that we would change our ways if we only realized what other people think of us.

Again, I’m not saying that Judgers are not justified or correct; I’m explaining that their suggestions don’t work in remediating our problems. We are fully aware of the problems we create and feel self-loathing about them. In other words, their solutions don’t fix our problems like they would fix theirs. We have tried repeatedly to correct our actions, but failed each time. Self. Loathing.

More on why their advice, such as “Just wake up ten minutes earlier!” works for them, but not for us, is addressed here.

I’m So Very Normal

About ten years or so ago, in my forties (yes, I’m old- in my fifties), my husband was self-reflecting and reading a book on ADD. In doing so, he took a quiz and found that he was not ADD, but thought that perhaps I should take a look at this book. It might be of interest. Hmmm.

In taking this unscientific quiz, I found myself checking “yes” to many of the questions. Whaaaaaaat? Me? I don’t have problems listening to lectures, tracking movies, following directions, etc. I can focus ffor really long periods of time. I can sit still during long, boring classes. How could I possibly be ADD? This is messed up. But wait…

Maybe I’m Just a Little Bit ADD

In the years that passed, I sometimes reflected on some components of my life and suspected that I might have a touch of ADD. You know- a little bit. I didn’t really dig any deeper. I wasn’t shy about sharing my suspicions with others, after all, I didn’t have a lot of problems that other don’t have. I might be just a little ADD.

Don’t You Experience This Too?

Fast forward to this last year. I’m an elementary teacher, and I was discussing how to better use class time with another teacher friend who is a task management goddess. When I mentioned that time starts and stops, you know, is flexible, her eyes popped wide open. The expression on her face clearly showed that she was trying to cover up the “WTH did you just say?” thoughts that were racing through her mind. She then calmly asked me to explain what I meant.

I proceeded to tell her that time gets away from me and that it sometimes speeds up. Other times it slow down, and I squeeze tasks into that space. Many times it stands still, especially when I’m engaged in a task. I clearly baffled her, and she was fascinated by this. She had never heard it before.

This was my first big clue that other people don’t experience time the same way. I always kinda thought that it was how everybody perceived the passage of time, but I just did it a little more than others. In other words, I thought that I was just a little ADDish, not completely different than other people in a major way. How naive I was back then.

We discussed this for awhile, and she later asked me to speak to the school staff about how I experience time and how it affects my life. She thought that it could help other teachers understand how some of our students take in the world. I very willingly agreed to speak. They are all supportive colleagues and friends- what could possibly go wrong? Oh. My. God. I didn’t realize then that I would be opening Pandora’s box and that I would want to stuff it all back in afterwards.

My Big Reveal… Crickets

To make a long story short, I did tell a very small part of my time-perception reality at a staff meeting, and I was completely shocked by the reaction that I received from my teaching colleagues. Everyone was fantastically respectful and attentive, and that was actually part of the surprise. I went into this speech feeling that others would relate to what I was saying and that they would signal their agreement by nodding their heads in agreement. You know, they get it. They do it too.

I was completely unprepared for their silent, yet respectful stares. The room was filled with the screaming sound of utter silence. Their eyes were all staring at me, no one was doodling or working on their chromebooks like usual. Mouths were agape, revealing their utter disbelief. You know the feeling, like when someone announces something too intimate, personal, or painful.

My kind, supportive principal had a look of sheer pain on her face, like this was information that was too dysfunctional and intimate to be shared. She was literally looking away, grimacing. Another teacher, who I consider to be a good friend was visibly shaking his head. The quiet and the expressions CLEARLY stated What the hell are you talking about? and This is the most messed up thing I have ever heard. Mistakes were made. I immediately regret my decision. Retreat, retreat.

They Honestly Had Never Heard This

Now, I’m not exaggerating or being overly sensitive here. Case in point: afterwards, other teachers told me how powerful, surprising, brave, baffling, helpful, etc. my little talk was. Time and again, they told me how they had never heard of such a thing and couldn’t believe that I could even be a teacher with this kind of disability. That one kinda hurt, I must admit.

In case it appears that I am exaggerating, my task-management goddess friend agreed that the staff really had freaked out, respectfully of course. Again, it was very obvious that I was very much the minority and that I my explanation of time had blown their minds. They had never heard anyone explain this to them, obviously. They also don’t perceive time this way, at all, not even a little bit.

The Epiphany

This did NOT go down as I had expected. I did not, I mean not, prepare for this type of reaction. I honestly, after 53 years of life, did not know just how messed up I am. This was a real epiphany for me: my thinking is very different than most other people’s thinking, and in a very fundamental way. No, they did NOT know what I meant. Gut punch.

That night, I cried and cried. I felt that I had obviously overshared. The entire incident seemed like I had opened my proverbial kimono and exposed myself to my peers. Would my principal see me as fundamentally flawed from now on? Would she now view me as incompetent? Would my colleagues now pity me or see me as incompetent? What had I done? I take it back, I take it back. Forget I ever said this. Epic failure.

The Idea Begins to Take Shape

It took a few days and self-talks to work through the raw emotions and vulnerability that I felt. Eventually, I started to heal. Gradually, I concluded that if a small sample of society has no idea of how my brain works, that many, many, other people in the world don’t have this information either. Hence, this blogging seed was planted in my mind.

So over spring break, I began researching in earnest, and I didn’t find any website that explained what it is like to intake the most basic facets of life in this dysfunctional manner. I started my quest focusing primarily on time management difficulties. Only a few people, in comments on Reddit, were able to shed light on this topic. An aside, however, is that I did find literally volumes of hateful comments about jerks who don’t care about others. Judgers droned on about how to “fix” all of us Tryhards, and we frustrated the Emps (That’s legit.). They genuinely wanted to know why we can’t just leave ten minutes earlier for events.

During the course of that week, I decided to start my personal journey for real. I began reading books, taking quizzes, reading online, and seriously examining myself-perceptions, thinking patterns, dysfunctional paradigms, you name it. It was the beginning of an emotional struggle with myself, the start of a quest to permanently change the dysfunctional paradigms and behaviors in my life, and to help others like me and those who love them. I’m bound and determined to be on time and be a responsible adult.

So Here We Are

It still hurts a bit to admit it, but I really truly have ADD (not just a little, either). Maybe I can help you. Maybe those of you who share my disability can help others too. Additionally, it would be so cool if those of you who live with us could provide some ideas of how to keep your sanity. Let’s go on the adventure together, starting today.